Female by Design

Welcome to the Great Sex Grows series!
 
We're starting where it all begins: your mindset. Because here's the thing — it's not about what you wear, what time it happens, or what you do. When it comes to growing a beautiful sex life in marriage, your mindset matters most.
 
In this episode, Francie dives into three big ideas around shifting your thinking:
 
Growth mindset vs. fixed mindset. Do you come to this area of your marriage with openness and curiosity — or is there a quiet voice that says this is just how it is? A fixed mindset keeps you stuck. A growth mindset says not yet — and that little word changes everything.
 
Integrating your sexuality and your spirituality. For a lot of us, God was in one corner and sex was in another. But God made you as a whole person — mind, body, and spirit — and he's not ashamed of any of it. Inviting him into this area of your marriage? That's where real transformation begins.
 
Great sex requires practice. Take the pressure off. You're not supposed to have it all figured out. Great lovers are made, not born — and showing up as a learner, season after season, is exactly what growth looks like.
 
This episode is personal, practical, and full of the kind of honesty that will make you feel less alone and more hopeful about what's possible in your marriage.
 
Your mindset is the starting point. Let's shift it together.
 
Ready to go deeper right now?
Back to the Garden is the guide I wrote for exactly where you are — a married woman's guide to pleasure by design. It's the most honest thing I've put together, and at $18 it's the easiest yes you'll make this week. → here
Questions? Find me on Instagram or at franciewinslow.com

Hey friend — welcome back to the Female By Design Podcast!
Today marks the relaunch of one of my favorite teaching series: Great Sex Grows. It originally aired back in 2022, and honestly? I still stand by every word of it. It's practical, it's real, and I think it can meet you right where you are.
I'm jumping in with a fresh intro episode — sharing where life has taken me over the last four years, what I've learned, and why this message feels even more true to me today than when I first recorded it.
 Life has been full. Our family has walked through some significant health challenges, and through it all, I've watched this message get tested and proven. Sexual intimacy as a place of connection, comfort, and covenant isn't just theory — it's been an anchor for us.
 Over the next five episodes, we're getting into the mindset shifts, body awareness, communication habits, and God-given superpowers that actually move the needle in your marriage. It's practical, it's a little bit of a fire hose, and there is so much good stuff coming.
 One thing I want you to hear before we dive in: pick one or two ideas that feel like a get-to and let yourself be curious. No heaviness, no should — just an invitation to grow.
Great sex doesn't grow by accident. Let's grow together.
Ready to go deeper right now?
Back to the Garden is the guide I wrote for exactly where you are — a married woman's guide to pleasure by design. It's the most honest thing I've put together, and at $18 it's the easiest yes you'll make this week. → here
Questions? Find me on Instagram or at franciewinslow.com

What's the difference between a difficult marriage and a destructive one—and how do you know when it's time to speak up?
 
In this powerful conversation, Francie sits down with counselor and author Leslie Vernick to unpack destructive patterns in marriage, reclaiming your voice, and what it truly means to be a strong, biblical woman.
 
Together, they address harmful teachings around submission, the loss of a woman's voice, and how to discern between normal marital struggles and unhealthy or abusive dynamics. 
This episode offers both clarity and practical wisdom for women who feel confused, shut down, or unsure of what is healthy in their marriage.
 
What You'll Learn
The difference between a disappointing marriage and a destructive one
Why "submission" has often been misunderstood and misapplied
What it means to be an ezer—a strong, helping partner, not a silent one
How to begin using your voice in a healthy, grounded way
Signs of emotional, spiritual, or relational harm
How to discern your next steps with wisdom and support
 
A healthy marriage allows for honesty, growth, and mutual care. If your voice is consistently dismissed, ignored, or punished, something deeper may be wrong.
 
About Leslie Vernick
Leslie Vernick is a licensed counselor, author, and speaker dedicated to helping individuals and couples navigate difficult and destructive relationships. With over 40 years of counseling experience, she specializes in emotional abuse, relationship health, and biblical wisdom for real-life challenges.
She is the author of The Emotionally Destructive Marriage and founder of Leslie Vernick Ministries, where she equips women to move from confusion and fear into clarity, strength, and truth.
 
Resources + Next Steps
 
Book: The Emotionally Destructive Marriage by Leslie Vernick
Website: leslievernick.com (find the Free Quiz: Is your marriage difficult, disappointing, or destructive? And, Free Training: If He Doesn't Hit You, Is It Still Abuse?)
 
If you are in a situation that feels unsafe or confusing, seeking wise, informed support is an important next step.
 
Note from Francie
This conversation may feel tender or activating if you've experienced harm in your marriage. You are not alone, and there is help available.
 
Connect with Francie
🎓 Back to the Garden: A Married Woman's Guide to Pleasure by Design — get a see a fresh vision of what a fully alive, God-honoring intimacy (and pleasure) could actually look like for your marriage. → here
🌿 The Circle — group mentorship community where women have conversations with likeminded women on a journey together towards more→ here
📩 Submit your listener question → Instagram DMs or franciewinslow.com

How do you overcome body insecurity and actually feel at home in your body?
In this episode, Francie addresses the shame, disconnection, and cultural lies that shape how women view their bodies—and invites you back to God's truth: your body is not a problem to fix, but a gift to receive.
You'll learn how body image struggles are often rooted in disconnection, why separating from your body isn't spiritual, and how to begin rebuilding a relationship with your body through truth, gratitude, and awareness. 
This is an invitation to move from criticism to compassion—and from insecurity to confidence in your God-given design.
What You'll Learn:
Why body insecurity runs deeper than appearance
How shame and culture shape body image
God's design for your body as good
Why disconnection from your body leads to insecurity
Simple ways to reconnect with your body and build confidence
Your body is not your enemy.
Confidence begins when you reconnect with your body through truth, not striving.
Connect with Francie
🎓 Back to the Garden: A Married Woman's Guide to Pleasure by Design — get a see a fresh vision of what a fully alive, God-honoring intimacy (and pleasure) could actually look like for your marriage. → here
🌿 The Circle — group mentorship community where women have conversations with likeminded women on a journey together towards more→ here
📩 Submit your listener question → Instagram DMs or franciewinslow.com

It's one of those questions more women have than are willing to ask out loud. In this episode of Female by Design, Francie tackles the topic of pubic hair grooming — not from a medical or therapeutic chair, but from the spirit of let's just have the conversation. Because when we can talk about our bodies without shame, that's exactly where freedom grows.
This is not a moral issue. There is no law, no biblical mandate, no "Christian way" to groom. Francie opens by inviting listeners to release the tension that so often surrounds conversations about our bodies and sexuality, and to approach this one with curiosity instead of shame.
This one's practical, a little lighthearted, and totally judgment-free. 
 
Resource Mentioned
The Vagina Bible: The Vulva and the Vagina — Separating the Myth from the Medicine by Dr. Jen Gunter — a physician-written, research-based guide to women's health covering everything from anatomy to menopause to grooming. A great resource to have on your shelf (and to share with your daughters as they grow).
 
Connect with Francie
🎓 Pleasure & Orgasm Course — one of Francie's most popular offerings, going deep on female pleasure and anatomy → franciewinslow.com
🌿 The Circle — group mentorship community where women have these conversations together → franciewinslow.com
📩 Submit your listener question → Instagram DMs or franciewinslow.com